I had done it this time, “it” meaning I, once again, failed to act classy and professional, even though I was trying—really trying—to. The faculty and administration for all three of Girard’s schools were to come together in the cafeteria where lunch was provided for the first day of indoctrination. Students had not yet shown up for classes.

I admit, I was nervous about coming out of retirement to teach again. Proving I was capable of handling the new technology (i.e., that I was not a complete moron) was stressful. Greeting me as I entered the cafeteria was the buffet of hotdogs and hamburgers, salads and condiments. Most of the faculty were already seated, even though we were not starting for five minutes. Plenty of time to grab my lunch and find a seat.

After placing a hot dog, bun and a bag of chips on my paper plate, I walked towards the condiment line…which is where I looked over the crowd and noticed that no person had food in front of them. They were seated at large, circular tables, that were void of food. And there I was, taking care of first-things-first (eating).

Apparently, we were to eat after the meeting, not during the meeting.

As stealthily as possible, I reversed course, slowly walking backwards, and placed my chips back in the basket. But what should I do with my wiener? This was a problem. Without even thinking, I grabbed the tongs and removed the hotdog from its bun, returned it to the steaming tray, and did the same with its bun. The paper plate, napkin and fork came next, and as calm as I could fake it, I meandered over to the nearest table with an empty seat and introduced myself.

I was trying to be as cool as a used hotdog. Nonchalant. The relaxed, peaceful kind of nonchalant. Not the apathetic, indifferent, uncaring and smug nonchalant…actually, not that much different than we Christians can act. The first group can be faked. The second group doesn’t need to be. They have been lulled into a spiritual slumber and, sadly, contribute to the “I don’t care” attitude that permeates many Christian circles, telling themselves that attending Sunday service, sometimes praying before meals and answering “yes” when asked if they love Jesus is enough.

Modern churches strive to solve the problem. They now serve donuts, host coffee bars, use state-of-the-art, multi-media technology and rock out with live bands. None of that is bad…until it replaces the message of a Risen Savior who sacrificed his life for us. Who calls us to glorify him at work, school, home and in our community. Who asks that nothing comes before him.

We must ask ourselves if we go to church to be entertained or to worship, to draw closer to God or to check off our holy, weekly duty. Are we there to find depth in our spiritual walk or to catch up on our overlooked texts during the sermon? Do we desire to be an example to those watching us, or do we scurry out of church, making sure we don’t miss our beloved Chiefs or get to the local restaurant before the crowd? Do we take the time to greet those in the pews around us, or are we waiting for them to greet us first? Have we learned to feign peace and calmness when our lives are anything but? Like I did in that cafeteria?

Maybe it’s time we all take a backward spiritual step, ask ourselves how much we are pretending to be something we aren’t… and then do something about it.