Friends for 50 years delivered the eulogy of my son-in-law’s dad, Paul. At last month’s celebration-of-life, we learned much about this man. From the time he was young, Paul sought adventure. When he was seven years old, he discovered a Christmas present under his parents’ bed. While they were at work, he opened it, found a bike, assembled it and rode around the block a few times. When finished, he took the bike apart and placed it back in its box, placing it exactly as he found it.
According to Steve, Paul’s friend, on Christmas morning, his parents were amazed at how quickly he assembled the bike. It was years before they knew their son’s secret. When Paul was 12, he decided to learn to drive, so when his parents were at work, he drove around town in one of their cars. His dad became suspicious and placed a white mark on the tire so that, if Paul “borrowed” the car, the mark on the tire would end up in a different position and Paul would be busted. Realizing his father’s tactic, Paul would drive home, jacked up the car and rotate the tire to the exact position in which he had found the white mark.
The stories were endless. Trophies were awarded for races he won as a young adult (going over 200 mph) in the Bonneville Flats after teaching himself how to increase the power of his engine, and he and Steve rode their jet skis into the Hoover Dam tunnels where they found themselves at the base of the gigantic engines that ran the dam, clearly a dangerous no-no.
Following the funeral, many of us shared the same story: we had no idea Paul had done what we had just heard. How was that possible? We had known him for decades, yet we knew little about his life. We lost an incredible opportunity to hear, first-hand, about his crazy adventures and why he made the decisions he did. His gutsiness was why he took risks and started his own, very successful company.
Relationships take work. They require listening skills where questions are asked so that others have a chance to share their life. I love hearing people’s stories, so what kept me from asking Paul about his? My loss.
When asked the most important commandment, Jesus talked about one’s vertical relationship with God the Father; the horizontal relationship with our fellow man came in a close second. Clearly, relationships are at the core of Christian living. Sadly, we now have entered a messed-up world where texting has taken over as the main method of correspondence. You know, “How R U?” Short and sweet. Very few, face-to-face encounters.
Sure, we may text-ask someone’s opinion on a scripture or on politics or even about a cute meme we just sent, but true relationships are developed in person. Around the dinner table. On the front porch. On a walk. They take time. They take commitment. They take putting ourselves out. \
Frequently, when I run into people, we end our short conversation with, “We have to get together soon.” But I get busy and fail to follow through. I am short-changing the incredible possibilities for how God has wired people to bless each other when I do not make this happen.
There is one relationship we cannot afford to short-change, and that is ours with God. Our daily strolls with God, where we set aside minutes each day to talk with Him, to listen to His guidance, to thank Him for our blessings, lets Him know He matters most of all. I mean, He does…doesn’t He?