I find it difficult to be around married couples who constantly correct each other’s stories. Recently, Dave and I spent a couple of days with such a twosome. They both love the Lord and are bold in their faith, but that didn’t keep them from annoying me.
Conversations went like this:
He: So, we were on a 32-foot houseboat when we nearly rolled over. We were…
She: It was a 30-foot houseboat.
He: Okay, but we were terrified that the storm—that came fast and out of nowhere…
She: We had a warning. We saw the clouds in the distance but didn’t know it was as bad as it was.
He: You’re thinking of the time we were in our sailboat and we…
She: No. Remember, we had Jenn with us and she was five years old and she was hiding under the kitchen table. The sailboat was another time.
He: No, it wasn’t. When the lightning flashed, we were alone on the 32-foot houseboat.
My head was ping-ponging back and forth as I attempted to make eye contact with the person speaking.
The fact was, I didn’t care what kind or size of boat they were on. I could see the frustration in the husband’s face who couldn’t say anything without being admonished.
The wife, for some reason, didn’t seem to mind as much when she was set straight.
But I did.
I understand that we are to love those who frustrate us, but is there a point where we speak up…in love, of course? Usually, I can make a joke to point out other’s offensive behaviors, but if they aren’t close friends, is that my place?
Our goal is to become more like Christ. To “nit-pick” makes us nothing like him. So, shouldn’t I help this couple by pointing out how annoying their pattern is and how they will never have really close friends because they are so irritating? I need wise counsel on this. I turn to God’s Word.
As I search Scripture for answers, I am directed to Matthew 7:3-5: Why do you see the speck that is in your brother’s eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye? Or how can you say to your brother, “Let me take the speck out of your eye,” when there is the log in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother’s eye.
Not the resolution I’m seeking, but I shouldn’t be surprised.
It seems that every time I set out to correct someone else’s flaws, I have to look in a mirror. This time, however, I can disregard Matthew’s writing because correcting my hubby is not one of my problems.
Dave and I are to go to dinner with this couple tonight. We discuss ways we can address this annoyance.
“Dave, maybe I could just come out and say, ‘Remember when you brought up the 32-foot houseboat that almost rolled over and were immediately set straight?”
“Well, Patty, you could do that, except the conversation started with his wife talking about an almost-accident she had on a jet ski when the storm came in.”
“Absolutely did not happen that way. Remember she said it was 30-feet long?
“Maybe we’re not the ones who should try and help.”
“Yeah, maybe you’re right.”